| Oh, St. John's ... i do not yet want to say farewell to thee... |
[21 Aug 2008|06:25pm] |
Well, that's it. It's set in stone, the door has shut behind me, and i have no choice now.
Just got off the phone with my dad to finally purchase the plane ticket to go back to BC. A plane ticket to leave St. John's. To leave Carolyn and her family behind. To leave a great friend, Adam behind. And other friends who've made this experience a nice one - like Jenny, and Darrel (JR), and Kristine, and Trevor, and even Mandi (even though we only met for the first time in 5 years a couple weeks ago, haha) ...
I'm not sure if i'm ready to leave all them yet. I know i'm broken up with Carolyn, but i still feel as though she's a close sister to me, and i don't like leaving her completely lonely. I'll miss the familiarity of the city - knowing how to get to places on the bus at any time they're available. There's an overall friendliness that exudes from most of the inhabitants of Newfoundland. Big hearts the like i've never experienced anywhere else.
I'm gonna miss the forest path just a block away from the apartment building. It was a great source of peaceful escape, to sit, and read next to the tinkling sound of the slow part of the river on the wooden benches.
I feel apprehensive now that it's final. I'm not apprehensive about Laura and me, but just that i am leaving such a unique city to go back to one that i'm told has risen in crime rates. To live there for a few months before moving to another place where water is a scarce commodity, and it has desert-like conditions. I know i'll cope, but ... heat. I don't think i would have survived another BC summer the way i was dying in 2003 in june ... i can't imagine how a Wyoming summer would be like. I don't think i'll leave the air conditioner for a second, heh. And what's worse is i'm probably gonna have to start getting used to the wacky Fahrenheit system for reading the temperature! I'll have no idea if it's 20 or 35 degrees, because it'll be some insane number like 80 or 90 or something.
I don't know. I still wanted to be in this city for longer - just absorb the sites and the people - but i quit my job, and i couldn't find another one, and the opportunity to make a plan just jumped out at me and i know i'll be ok. It's just ... this city, St. John's, Newfoundland, Canada, has been a part of me for just under 1/5th of my life!
It's just so final. I may never see St. John's, NL ever again. I may never see Carolyn ever again. Despite our differences and negativity, we also had a lot of positive times, and i love her as family now. Just to spend 5 entire years with a person and then be cut off a few months after a break-up. And her wonderful family, too. I certainly hope it isn't forever - but with jobs and money as it is these days, it's amazing people can even afford to have cars, much less travel for the hell of it.
I'm going to need to buy a bigger memory card for my new digital camera so i can take a decent amount of pictures of the place before i go ...
Overall, despite the 6 month winters, and horrible drivers, and thick smoke in the apartment, the 6-years-behind-every-other-province in many laws and minimum wage and stuff like that - this place has been really good to me. People were much more willing to give me a chance than i've experienced anywhere else.
Man, someone must be making turkey or the Newfy "Cooked Dinner" in the building today - makes me realize how much i'm gonna miss Carolyn's excellent cooking (and her mom's, and her older sister's). Not that i'm a bad cook myself, but i just don't know how to cook a whole turkey or a whole chicken or make gravy - i doubt they have salt beef anywhere else, or scrunchions to be eaten with cod ... I'm very happy to have had "Fish'n'Brewis" for breakfast one more time at a restaurant Laura and i went to. That's also traditional Newfy food.
Hell, i don't even know if EB Games will be anywhere i move to in the coming year or so! If there's anything i wanted and have games to trade, i should do it now. There wasn't one in BC - i hope there's some sort of game trading store near where i'm gonna live in Wyoming.
Gotta get a passport.
Gotta renew my driver's license ... apparently out there, nothing is close to anything else ... that is going to be a huge adjustment to me, since i like walking when i can.
If anything it'll just add to the experiences in my life, and i won't have to wonder about not making the choice. Although, i may still wonder where my life would lead if i stayed in St. John's...
Fuck the cooking smell in the hallways smells good!!
Maybe i'll eat some more of my goulash. Already ate some of the minestrone i made yesterday ... or was that the day before?
My sleeping habits have been royally screwed up, mostly because i have no one to answer to, no one to feel guilty about not going to bed when they do, because i may keep them up late when they work early. I have video games and movies, and a comfy enough couch to nap on whenever i like... so i have no idea when yesterday or the day before was in relation to when i made the minestrone, hehe.
All i know is it's too damn good. If my minestrone could talk, it wouldn't answer any of your questions, "I'm sorry, i can't answer your question - i'm too busy Being Delicious!"
Now, barring Laura, who can guess where THAT's referenced from?
Anyway ... yah, wow ... it's final now. I will honestly be saddened to leave this city, and the people i've grown to know and love while living here...
|
|
![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
ozzmark's Friends Page
amused
tired
accomplished
relieved
sleepy
elated
nostalgic
frustrated
hungry
cheerful
groggy